Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Thursday, August 11, 2011

My Son Is Already Smarter Than Me


I've been studying with The Professor (age: 36 days) for a while now, and I must say, the experience has been extremely enlightening. He has so much knowledge to share, and under his stern yet forgiving tutelage I have already learned a great deal. Today, I'd like to pass along some of the wisdom he has imparted so far...
  • If someone is being too loud and you're unable to pacify them using traditional means, give them the finger. That will shut them up.
     
  • When you're in charge, you don't need to ask nicely to get what you want. Just keep screaming, and eventually other people will do it for you.
     
  • There's no need to cry over spilt milk, or let a little blood faze you. But if anyone ever puts you down, wail at them with all your might. They'll think twice about doing it again.
     
  • People don't learn from their mistakes unless there are consequences that affect them personally. Don't tell them what they did wrong right at the start; let things leak out over time. Only then will they learn.

    And, of course,
     
  • If you're beautiful, you can get away with pretty much anything.
I already knew that last one, but ain't it the truth.

9 comments:

  1. He really does look old and wise. Like a gnome wizard.

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  2. Awwwww---what a smart little guy! he's so cute! And a Cancer... take it from another cancer--crusty on the outside, soft on the inside. He will probably be just a little more sensitive than he seems at first glance. We also love forever... no matter what.

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  3. Matthew, I'm going to take that as a compliment. And now I must buy him a pointed hat, the choice of both gnomes and wizards worldwide.

    Hart, crusty on the outside and soft on the inside? So true. That's our little stuffed-crust pizza.

    Alex, excellent! I was going for funny.

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  4. Love the one about "leaking" out the lesson. Isn't it amazing how well they communicate without words.

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  5. He is wise beyond his years, er, months that is. Love the spilt milk one.

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  6. My independent research confirms your findings!

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  7. Chuck, I'm pretty sure he's wise beyond my years. Or behind my ears. He just pulled a shiny nickel out from behind my left one.

    Aleem, I had a feeling it might. I'm glad to know there is no East Coast bias within The Professor's teachings.

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