Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Monday, July 16, 2012

Professor Cupcakeface

The last two weeks, you may have noticed I've been ignoring my blog sweating profusely busy living. The highlight of the past fortnight: My son turned one.

Here are my answers to the most common questions concerning The Professor:
  • No, he's not walking on his own yet. He is, however, an Olympic speed-crawler, a master xylophonist, an expert stair-climber, and the world's foremost daddy-climber. He also currently holds the record for fastest floor-to-mouth time, public toy division.
  • Two and a half teeth.
  • He is eating us out of house and home, and then house again for good measure. He eats anything and everything we give him, sometimes in greater quantities than us.
  • Favorite food: Cherries. He'll eat them until he's purple in the face. And the hands. And the hair. And the ears. And the...
  • Favorite phrase: "Uh oh."
  • Favorite game: Going pell-mell for the dog bowls and trying to flip one over before we reach him.
  • Favorite birthday gift: The card with the vibrating baby in it.*

* It's not a live baby. It's a picture of a baby holding maracas, shaking "what his mama gave him." I'm not sure if that's any less disturbing.

What's that? You're tired of reading my drivel and want to see the pictures? Well, here you go, you ingrate:


Bubbles!


He started off slow, taking one delicate pinch of frosting at a time...


...and then someone gave him a fork.


An aerial view of the carnage.


Fully sated, he cast the half-eaten cupcake carcass to the floor.


But then... remorse. Not over the devastation he had wrought on the unsuspecting cupcake,
but because the rest of it was whisked away before the dog could share in his fun.


My son: The life of the party.

12 comments:

  1. That reminds me of my nephew eating spaghetti when he was young - not a pretty sight!

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    Replies
    1. I've got a similar picture of him after a pasta dinner. There's sauce everywhere; it's bloody fantastic.

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  2. I can't believe he's a year old already! Crazy! And the older he gets, the more i think he looks like you.
    I'll cross my fingers that he keeps his explorative eating habits through his childhood years, because picky eaters are a trial

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    1. That's very kind of you, but it's okay, you can uncross your fingers. (You probably need to use them for things.) He may look like me, but he has his mother's eyes, and perhaps her taste buds, so I think we're safe.

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  3. He's adorable. Even (or especially) smeared in frosting.

    It is amazing how crazy fast a small child can get to a dog bowl and dump all the water on the floor, isn't it?

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    1. Interestingly enough, I look better smeared in frosting, too. But that's because you see less of my actual face.

      The food bowl isn't as bad, especially since he hasn't eaten any (yet). As for the water... not only does he soak himself, but it's an old house. Which is to say, none of our floors are level. And water (at least, the water his diaper and pants don't absorb) flows downhill quickly.

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  4. Belated wishes for a very happy birthday, Professor! That Bubbles picture was adorable. (The cupcakes pics gave me the shakes, I'm not gonna lie.) ;-)
    Some Dark Romantic

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    1. The frosting shots may have given you the shakes, but surprisingly The Professor didn't even go on a sugar high. He was pretty much his normal self, right up until his bedtime, when he crashed. (Not literally. The motorized 4-wheeler he got was out of juice, so it didn't go anywhere.)

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  5. That, my friend, is going to keep you busy for a while...might even seem like years. But keep posting the pics cause they friggin' hilarious!

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    1. Luckily, I've got years to waste. And don't worry, I'll keep posting photos. Personally, posting pics o' the Professor is a popular pastime. (Alliteration's fun, too.)

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  6. These pictures are so adorable! Thanks for sharing.

    www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

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