Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Sometimes, The Wheel is on Fire

Saturday, May 26, 2012

The Professor Returns



I haven't shared much about The Professor (age: 10½ months) since the beginning of the semester, so I thought now would be the perfect time to recap the last few months. I'll do my best to be concise, though, so you can focus on more important things. Like the photos.

The Professor basically has three moods. In order of descending frequency:
  1. Happy — characterized by laughing, smiling, clapping, waving, cooing, babbling, drumming, and high-fiving1
  2. Exploratory — he takes things in visually, tactilely, and of course, orally
  3. Fussy — brought on solely by hunger, illness, or tiredness2
He seemingly has a fourth mood, wherein he appears to be over-serious. If he stays that way for any length of time, however, invariably he is sucking on a tiny pine cone.3



Although he can't walk on his own yet, he has mastered the art of the double dribble. No, not like a basketball player. Like a soccer-playing baby.4



The Professor has also been diagnosed with Schadenfreude Katzenartig, a condition so rare I had to name it myself. He's expected to overcome it eventually, but basically it means this: Although otherwise empathetic to others' misfortune, he laughs his head off when our cat Schrödinger has a hairball.



And there, once you've take a look at the full set of The Professor's pictures (with the 37 newest photos at the bottom), you'll be all ready for the final exam.

I'm kidding, of course; there's no way you'll be ready, not after missing so many classes. You're going to fail miserably. But, if you still want to give it the ol' college try, The Professor put together this study guide just for you.


1 His three favorite things, in order of descending hilarity: 1) swift shifts in vantage point (e.g. swooping, spinning, baby lifts); 2) tickle tickle tickle time!; 3) whatever the cat is doing.
2 Extremely Put Out is technically an extension of Fussy. It is caused by minor injury, extreme over-tiredness, and extreme Daddy taking too long to give him more Cheerios.
3 This has now happened twice, but two out of two is still "invariably." The dog tracks these things into the house on occasion, and the little Professor — the proud owner of two teeth, I might add — keeps at it, working it around in his mouth, hoping the thing will dissolve like everything else he eats so he can swallow it. Last week, when this first occurred, it took my wife a half hour to figure out what was "wrong."
4 No, not like a footballer who drops to the turf whining about his ankle every time someone gets within a yard of him. I'm talking about two succinct dribbles at the same time: one from his mouth, one with his feet.

16 comments:

  1. god he's so cute. I think he looks a lot like you. Does he laugh at the dog too, or just the cat?

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    1. Actually, no. It would seem the cat is inherently hilarious, but the dog is only there to rush toward excitedly and smack in the face once or twice before she expertly removes herself from the situation.

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  2. To be fair... cats with hairballs are kinda funny.

    Jo
    In Which We Start Anew

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    1. The Schadenfreude is strong in this one.

      Lucky for us, Schrödinger goes through all the motions but rarely coughs anything up. So The Professor gets his entertainment, and there's no cleanup involved.

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  3. Replies
    1. Of course! It's those big brown eyes (courtesy of my wife) and his infectious laugh (courtesy of whoever infected him with it).

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  4. Great pics dude...looks like a attention grabbing ball of fun!

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    1. Thanks, Chuck. And as a matter of fact, he does often grab our attention by grabbing a ball of fun. He's got plenty to choose from: one rattles, one plays music, another lights up. And they all either go directly into his mouth, or get rolled/flung across the floor (and then go in his mouth).

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  5. The Professor is the cutest thing. And I'll admit that cats with hairballs can be hilarious...if it's not at 2 in the morning ;)

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    1. I'm glad someone else agrees with me! My sister is always trying to say her son is the cutest thing, but that's not possible, since The Professor is younger and smaller with bigger eyes, so obviously he's the cutest. Not that it's a competition. (Because he's already won.)

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  6. Awesome pics of the Professor! He may be building a machine to open wormholes when you're not looking.

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    1. Hell, he's probably doing it when I am looking. I wouldn't know the difference.

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  7. These are wonderful pictures! The professor is a beautiful baby . . .I mean, handsome little dude. I love the humor in your post . . . my kids thought my cats were pretty funny too.

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    1. Thanks, Tyrean. I try to stop myself from calling him a baby, too. Not that he has any problem with it yet... but then again, he might. I haven't quite kept track of when he tries to put his hand in my mouth.

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  8. Great pics, God is great always.....

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    1. Well, I suppose if you believe God is everywhere, then he's certainly great in terms of size. But, being a Jewish Atheist, the only God I believe exists once played basketball for Providence College. He's kind of average.

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