Wednesday, November 26, 2014

My Bi-Monthly Post to Prove I'm Still Alive

I haven't written anything here in a while.[citation needed] Thus, by now a good number of you have surely come to the conclusion that I'm dead. I assure you I'm not. As proof, I offer you this: I am writing this post.

Okay, fine. Technically I could have written and scheduled this ages ago. I assure you I didn't. As proof, I offer you this: I don't plan ahead; I procrastinate.1

Anyway, here is some of what's happened over the past few months:
  • My wife officially beat cancer a second time.
  • My improv group had its debut performance. We rocked.
  • My son became fully potty-trained. It rocked.
  • I made umpteen repairs to our house with my own two hands.2
  • One of my photos was used in a Buzzfeed article. (It's #3.) I only found out after my friend Scott (the pinchee) was asked if it was him or his doppleganger.
  • For Halloween I dressed as a Disney lawyer for a Disney-themed party, handing out cease-and-desist orders to everyone else there.
  • I read over 100 books.3
  • The National Science Foundation asked to use haiku from my 2012 Robot Haiku contest in an upcoming campaign. (I'll post a link once the campaign launches.)
  • I went for a jog today.4
  • I wrote this post.5
So there you have it. I'm alive.

Probably.


1 Note to self: Write this footnote before posting.
2 "Umpteen" means "innumerable," or in other words, "unable to be counted," so technically what I said is true. (It turns out I'm much better at doing repairs with my father's own two hands.)
3 Almost every one contained pictures of trucks.
4 This is more impressive than it sounds. Not much more, mind you, and it really depends on your interpretation of the word "impressive," but still.
5 This is far less impressive than it sounds.

6 comments:

  1. That's great news about your wife!
    Glad you're not dead, Nate.

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  2. I mean, if we're getting technical, anyone could be writing this post as "you". But, also, that could have always been the case. We could all just be the same person, writing fake blogs and commenting back and forth.
    Or not.
    Great news about your wife, though! And your improv group rockin it out.

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    Replies
    1. Of course we're not the same person, Sarah. That would be silly. I am, in fact, your twin.

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  3. I'm pretty impressed! Good news about you, your wife, and your son. I just saw an ad for a potty chair with an IPad holder attached. It might make potty training easier, but I wonder what it will do to productivity down the road. After all, it's just a matter of time before parents become jealous and demand an adult version...

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    Replies
    1. That's so funny. It almost sounds like you haven't already rigged up an adult iPotty like the rest of us...

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