Pirate Haiku Contest!

** The contest is now closed. Check out the winners. **

Announcing The Wheel’s 2nd Annual Haiku Contest!

Last year, it was ninja haiku. This year’s theme: Pirates.

It's not difficult:
You just write five syllables,
Then seven, then five.

And you write about pirates. The eye patch-and-parrot types, sure, but also those with illegally obtained music, or any others you might think of. With so many different types of piracy out there, I'm not about to restrict you.

So, write your own pirate haiku in the comments section below. Two lucky winners will receive a treasure chest full of gold doubloons $25 Amazon gift cards.

I will be selecting the best haiku in each of two categories:

• Humorous/Creative
• Traditional (i.e. eloquent, evocative, etcetera)

The deadline to submit a haiku is this Saturday, May 7 at 5:00pm (Eastern Time). Please review the official rules below before entering.

Pirate poetry. Let's make it happen, people. Good luck!

Official Rules:

1. To enter, post pirate-related haiku in the comment section below. Multiple submissions are allowed, but if you submit more than five (5), you may begin to get on my nerves, and I'll get our resident witch doctor to curse you. (Oh, the profanity!)
2. Standard haiku rules apply. To qualify, each entry must be a three-line poem, the first line containing exactly 5 syllables, the second line 7 syllables, and the third line 5 syllables. If you miscount, I'll know I can't count on you, and both you and your entry will be sent into the briny depths.
3. The contest is open until Saturday, May 7, 2011 at 5:00pm, Eastern Time. If you try to sneak an entry in after the deadline, you will be caught hiding below deck and stranded on a deserted island. Like your carcass, your entries will be picked apart by scavenging birds. They will no longer have enough syllables, and be disqualified.
4. Entries must be in English. (i.e. Using Japanese kanji will not help you win for best traditional haiku. If I can't understand you, obviously you're plotting mutiny against me, and I'm not about to let you steal this contest which I've been captaining for years. You will finish in dead last. Because my first mate will slit your throat.)
5. Anonymous entries will not win. If you try to hide your identity, clearly you're running from something, and I don' t need that sort of trouble. I'll feed you to the sharks. Or to the shrieking eels. Then I'll claim any valuable writing you had on your person as my own.
6. Prizes will be awarded in each of two categories: Humorous/Creative and Traditional.
   
   • Two (2) first place winners will each receive a $25 Amazon gift card for which to purchase booty.
   • An indeterminate number of Honorable Mentions will receive bragging rights over everyone who doesn’t win. Also, honor.
7. I will act as sole judge, and select the winning haiku based on the aforementioned criteria, as well as other criteria I make up as I go along. All decisions are final, and will not be changed under any circumstances unless bribery is involved.