Monday, June 11, 2012

Raising the Bar

In my last post, my second footnote had a needle pulling thread walk into a bar. I then proceeded to riff on needles and sewing, churning out pun after glorious pun. It may well be my best footnote to date.1

The love I got for that bit made me want to challenge myself further. And that's where you come in. What I need from each of you is something that might "walk" into a bar.

It could be another inanimate object, like the needle. Perhaps a profession or celebrity or fictional character. Maybe an animal, vegetable, or mineral. But whatever you give me, they'll soon be entering a bar. And hilarity (or at least vast amounts of punnery) will ensue.

So, what've you got for me?


1 Mostly because it knows how to sew and can mix a stellar martini. But really, I wouldn't suggest dating any of my footnotes. They don't take anything seriously, and well, I know they say size doesn't matter, but...

17 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. How about a sea-monkey, indeed. I've tackled that one, and let me tell you, it has a couple Dewzies in it: (A sea-monkey walks into a bar...)

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  2. I love "walk into a bar" jokes. And footnotes.

    A bowl of Rice Crispies walk into a bar...

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    Replies
    1. Alas, my solution doesn't contain any footnotes, but I have a feeling you might Dig'Em anyway: A bowl of Rice Krispies walks into a bar...

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  3. Replies
    1. Wow, Star Wars was tougher than I thought, since so many names would've required speech impediments to get their references in there. Still, like Lucas's work, it's a masterpiece. Jabba the Hutt walks into a bar...

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  4. A penguin (first thing that popped into my head).

    Also, hurray for literate & funny footnotes!

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    1. The penguin should be accompanied by Shakespeare.
      I bet you thought I forgot :)

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    2. Always go with your first instinct, Katy. Thanks for the suggestion (and Denise, thanks for meddling). Now, as the curtains open, a penguin and William Shakespeare walk into a bar...

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  5. Replies
    1. Of course, only you would think to give me TB. Well, you've got your wish: Tuberculosis walks into a bar...

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  6. A goat. Let a goat walk into a bar. Somewhere, someplace, I read something about how people shouldn't marry a goat. Why not? Are we hurting their feelings?

    So, I say, if we can't marry 'em, the least we can do is buy 'em a stiff drink. (Why does that sound like something someone said to ME?)

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    1. I agree people shouldn't marry a goat. One goat does not a marriage make. You need at least two parties, so... two goats.

      By the way, the goat does order a stiff drink. (Stiff as in he has to chew it.) A goat walks into a bar...

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  7. Replies
    1. And in the thrilling conclusion to my 10-part series, Nate Wilson walks into a bar... (Note: It's really not that thrilling. I get panned.)

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